No Good For Me
by cklovewinter
Summary: Lily is crying in the girls dormitory and her friends are trying to comfort her. What happened and what does the infamous James Potter have to do with it? Rated T to be safe. RxR
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: Hey guys! I know I had uploaded the first four chapters to this stories already but I would reallu like you to read them again so you can understand the story better. I've changed the names of all my OCs and I hope you won't get too confused by it, but I think it was necessary. All chapters that had been uploaded before were edited and I hope they're better this way. The storyline continues the same though. I know it's been a while since I've updated this story but I think this time was necessary and I think my writting has improved in the meantime, hopefully making the story more enjoyable and better to read. Please, just give this story another chance. Chapter 5 will be out very soon and I'm working on Chapter 6 already. Love, Caroline xx**

* * *

Little snowflakes fell to the grounds of Hogwarts. Most of the students who had chosen to stay at the school for the holidays were outside, playing with the snow. Four girls were in their dormitory at the Gryffindor Tower. Their names were Lily Evans, Marlene McKinnon, Dorcas Meadowes and Emmeline Vance. They were considered the most beautiful girls at the school. All guys wanted to date them and most of the girls wanted to be like them. They had become friends in first year and were hardly ever seen apart. And there was something that made them different and even more beautiful to others' eyes: they had always smiles on their faces. But something was wrong that day: one of them was crying and the other three were trying to comfort her and find out the reason for her sadness.

"Lily, please, tell us what happened!" pleaded Marlene while caressing Lily's beautiful red hair. They had arrived at dormitory about half an hour ago and had found Lily crying and sobbing like they had never seen it before.

"Lene is right," said Emmeline "We're worried, you're not the type of girl who cries her eyes out like this every day." They all knew that something really bad must have happened. Lily didn't use to cry very often.

"Emm, please, give Lily a break, let her calm down first." asked Dorcas "She'll tell us when she feels a bit better, right Lils?"

"Thanks D," she said starting to calm down a bit "Can you guys, please, just leave me alone in the room for 30 minutes?" Her voice was filled with pain and it broke her friends' heart to see her like that. She didn't have to say it twice; the girls understood that she needed some time alone to think.

"Of course we can." said Emmeline "I'm sorry honey, I'm just worried, you know I didn't mean to..."

"I know you didn't, sweetheart," Lily interrupted and raised her head from Marlene's lap "I just really need these 30 minutes..."

Dorcas, Marlene and Emmeline hugged Lily and left the bedroom, walked down the stairs and took seats at the Gryffindor Common Room. What they didn't notice was that at the other side of the room were four boys and that they were listening to their conversation.

"Girls, I'm really worried about my twin," said Dorcas "I've never seen her crying like this, something really bad must have happened..."

"You're right D," said Marlene "She was always the strong one in our group, while you were the most empathetic one and Emm the one who could always make us feel better and smile."

"Don't forget that you're the one who always finds a solution to all our problems," said Emmeline, smiling to her friend.

"Have I heard it right? Did you say 'twin'?" interrupted a handsome boy with hazel hair and eyes. He was one of the guys who were _conveniently _listening to the conversation. "Since when do you have a twin sister, D? I've always thought you just had a little sister..."

"You've thought right, James. I do only have a little sister" Dorcas said, laughing lightly. James looked at her even more confused than he was before and she decided to explain what she meant "James, have you ever noticed Lily and I have exactly the same green eyes? We noticed it when we saw each other in our first year here at Hogwarts and decided we have twin eyes. So, we just call each other 'twin'."

"Well, I have to agree that your eyes are pretty similar..." James stopped and analyzed Dorcas' eyes for a moment "But I think Lily's ones are still prettier," he said, smiling.

Dorcas rolled her eyes and a second later felt a pair of strong arms hugging her waist from behind. She didn't need to look to know who these arms belonged to.

"I'll have to disagree with you at this one, mate," said the blond-haired boy hugging Dorcas "I think D's eyes are way prettier than Lily's."

"Thank you, Remus," said Dorcas, turning her head to give him a sweet kiss on the cheek. They had been together since the end of fifth year, when Remus had finally taken the courage to ask her out. They had liked each other for a long time but both of them were too shy to make the first step and admit their feelings, although even the dumbest person in the world could tell they were perfect for each other.

"I hate disappointing you guys, but I like blue eyes better than green ones," said the third boy in the group, looking directly into Emmeline's blue eyes.

"Thank you, Ed," said Dorcas blushing. These were other two who were too shy to admit their feelings for each other. But things were starting to change in this case too. Edgar had finally asked Emmeline out and she couldn't be happier.

"I have to agree with Edgar on this one," said a Sirius Black, the last one of the group of boys "But I'd like to be a bit more specific. I like the ones with sky-blue eyes and long hazel hair." He continued, looking in Marlene's direction. Marlene and Sirius had been best friends and known each other since they were still in diapers, but a year ago they started to develop stronger feelings than friendship for each other.

Her cheeks turned as red as Lily's hair and she abruptly rose from her seat. She wasn't comfortable with her feelings. Sirius was a great friend but she was sure she would have her heart broken and friendship ruined, if she let herself get carried away by what she felt. He wasn't the type who used to stay faithful to the girls he dated and she was the kind of girl who took these things seriously.

"Guys, I'll go upstairs and take a look at Lily, I'm really worried about her," she said as she avoided making eye-contact with Sirius.

"Why are you worried about Lily?" James asked Marlene "What happened to her?" he was starting to get worried too.

"Lily was crying her eyes out when we left the dormitory," Dorcas told James "Go see if she is ok, Lene. You're the one she listens to the most. We'll stay a bit longer here so you have the time to make her spill."

Marlene nodded and made her way to the girl's bedroom, thinking on what Sirius had said. She didn't really believe a guy like him could fall for a girl like her... She shook her head to make this thoughts go away; she needed to concentrate in helping Lily right now.

* * *

Lily Evans - long red hair, green eyes

James Potter - hazel hair and eyes

Marlene McKinnon - long hazel hair, sky-blue eyes

Sirius Black - dark hair, gray-blue eyes

Dorcas Meadowes - long dark brown hair, green eyes

Remus Lupin - blond hair, green eyes

Emmeline Vance - long blond hair, blue eyes

Edgar Bones - bronze hair, green eyes


	2. Chapter 2

Arriving at the bedroom, Marlene found Lily staring at the roof, tears falling silently from her eyes. It was still a shock seeing her like this. She didn't like to show her feelings even to the ones who were really close to her. She preferred to keep it all to herself the longer she could take it.

She walked to the bed where Lily was laying and started caressing her hair, trying to make her feel better. "Do you think you'll be able to tell me what happened now, Lils?" asked Marlene, giving her friend a comforting look.

"Yes, but you'll have to tell the others when they come." Lily said "I don't think I can go through this twice." and for the look on her face, anyone could tell it was true. Marlene nodded and Lily started telling what happened.

"Right after lunch I was making my way to the library and that's when I saw... _the scene_..." she made a pause, sighed heavily and continued with her voice filled with pain "I saw James and... And he was kissing Sarah..." saying this, Lily started to cry again.

"Sarah Williams? But they broke up in fifth year, we're in seventh year now, this was a long time ago..." Marlene said. She remembered that James had dated this girl but he broke up with her and said that he couldn't stand her anymore, she was too boring and obsessive, wanted him to spend all his time with her and none with his friends.

"I know, I thought that too... I was starting to trust him when he said he liked me, I thought he had changed! You have no idea how disappointed I am," Lily was crying even harder than before and Marlene hugged her.

They heard a knock on the door and Dorcas and Emmeline entered the room. Both of them sent confused looks to Marlene.

"To make a long story short, Lily saw James kissing Sarah," Marlene explained simply, she knew she didn't need to say more than that for her friends to understand how bad the situation was.

"But they broke up in fifth year!" Kyrra said in disbelief.

"James broke the treaty..." said and open-mouthed Dorcas.

"Treaty?" asked Kyrra, she didn't remember being told of a treaty "What treaty?"

"I can't tell you guys that" she said with regret "Remus swore me to secrecy! I wasn't even supposed to know about it..."

"But D, this seems really important and it concerns Lily. She has the right to know!" argued the Emmeline. "If you don't tell us, I swear I'll _accidentally_ spill _Veritaserum_ into your pumpkin juice when you least expect it..." she threatened.

"Wow, wow, wow! Calm down, Emm. There's no need to take this kind of measure, right D?" Marlene asked her friend.

"No, there really isn't... If there's no other way around it, I'll tell you what this treaty is about," Dorcas started "Everyone knows that The Marauders, especially James and Sirius, are considered the most handsome boys in Hogwarts. Sirius and James have always liked this because they thought they could get every girl they wanted. In the middle of sixth year they realized that they could indeed have all the girls, _except the ones they wanted."_

"What do you mean with '_except the ones they wanted_', D?" asked a confused Lily. As far as she knew, no girl had ever said no to James or Sirius. Well, she did say no to James, but she had always thought he asked her out as a joke and she thought the scene she'd watched earlier just confirmed it.

"What she means, Lily," started Emmeline "is that James and Sirius _have fallen in love_ and that the girls they like don't want them because they had all the other girls."

"Exactly!" continued Dorcas "And in order to change this, the two of them decided to make a treaty: they were going to behave to see if these girls they really like changed their opinions."

"So this is the treaty James broke!" concluded Marlene "But wait! You said both of them have fallen in love, right?" she asked, to what Dorcas and Emmeline nodded "The one James has fallen for is obviously Lily..." Lily was about to interrupt her, but she continued "But what girl on earth would make Sirius want to make such a treaty? He would have told me, after all, we tell each other everything, he's my best friend," she received annoyed looks from all the girls in the room "Sorry, girls! Correcting: he is my best _guy_ friend," her three friends seemed much happier after the last part.

"Isn't it obvious, Lene?" said Lily "You are the one he loves, silly girl!" she spoke this part as if she was speaking to a kinder garden kid and continued in her normal voice seconds later "I just don't understand the reason you said the one James loves is me. I _can't_ be the reason why he made this treaty! He is way out of my league. And if it was me, he wouldn't have kissed Sarah, he would have kissed me."

"Dear Lily-flower! Stop talking all this nonsense! If he had tried to kiss you, you would probably have slapped him. Besides, you are _so_ wrong about him being out of your league, you are everything a boy could want! And so are you, Lene. You guys really need a bit more of self-confidence. So, while you two refuse to see what's in front of your pretty faces, D and I are going to eat dinner," said Emmeline "Bye!"

They left and Lily and Marlene looked at each other confused.

"Do you think they could be right about those two Marauders being in love with us?" Lily asked her friend.

"Well, I don't know... But let's think of this later, I'm starving!"

"So am I! Let's join them in the Great Hall"

And so they went the same way the other two had gone before.


	3. Chapter 3

The Great Hall was full as usual and the four Marauders were having dinner along with Dorcas and Emmeline when they saw Lily and Marlene heading their direction. Suddenly, Lily saw that her two friends were having dinner with the Marauders, and since that meant that James was included, stopped walking. She whispered something in Marlene's ear. The former nodded and they took seats located at the other end of the Gryffindor table.

"Girls, why didn't Lily and Lene come to sit with us?" asked James, who was watching what happened. "I don't really remember seeing you guys sit apart since you met in first grade."

"Are you sure you don't know the answer to this question, James?" inquired a serious Emmeline. They hadn't brought up the subject 'James kissed Sarah and Lily saw it', but it was clearly unavoidable now.

"Why should this have something to do with me? Honestly, I have no idea," affirmed a confused James, wondering why on earth he would know the answer.

"Lily saw you kissing Sarah, James! I can't believe you did this to her. I thought that you really liked her and would stop snogging other girls!" Dorcas said to James. Now that they were already talking about it, she wouldn't stop. She turned to face Sirius and continued "And beside that, Lene doesn't really want to face you right now, Six. You pushed your luck earlier in the Common Room. If anyone here really knows Lene, this person is you. You should know she would react this way!"

"Wait! You kissed Sarah, mate?" asked Edgar "I thought you two were over!"

"James, you broke our treaty!" said an astonished Sirius "But wait! Why wouldn't Lene want to face me? What did I say that was wrong? I just said I liked her eyes and hair colour."

"Just wait a minute, Sirius," interrupted James "Let me get some things clear here. I didn't kiss Sarah, she kissed me. I was coming out of the library when she came out of nowhere and attacked me. I pushed her away as soon as I realized what was going on. That girl is crazy!"

"Oh, and poor Lily was at the wrong place at the wrong time! James, you'll have to find a way to explain this to her tomorrow!" Emmeline said.

"Now that James got things straight, guys, please, you need to help me with Lene. Why do you think what I said earlier was wrong? She shouldn't be avoiding me if no crazy girl kissed me while she was watching!" Sirius didn't know what to do anymore. Since he had started having feelings for Marlene, things got so confusing. He was used to get every girl he wanted very easily and didn't know what to do in that situation.

"The answer to your question is very simple, Six." said Emmeline "She is afraid you're playing with her feelings!" she stated matter of factly.

"But I would never dare to hurt her! She is one of the most important people in my life," he said like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"We know that, Six. But she doesn't," explained Dorcas. "You've already kissed half the girls in Hogwarts and James has the other half. No wonder Lily and Lene are sceptic about the change in your behaviour," James and Sirius didn't like to hear it, although they knew it was true.

"Calm down, guys!" said Remus to his two sad friends "Tomorrow is Hogsmead day and you two will have the opportunity to solve your issues. D and I will be going together and Ed finally got the courage to ask Emm out, right, Ed?" Emmeline blushed hearing this and Edgar nodded "See? The only thing you two have to do is find a way to drag the girls somewhere calm and make things clear."

"Exactly!" exclaimed Emmeline. "James, you'll have to find a way to make Lily believe that Sarah was the one who kissed you and that you really like her. And Six, you'll have to convince Lene that you're absolutely not playing with her feelings and that your days being a 'guy of no girl' are over."

"I feel sorry for you guys," said Edgar. "Those two are the most headstrong girls on earth! It will be very hard to make them believe you, especially considering your past..." he was right; the two girls could be really difficult when the situation involved the possibility of getting hurt.

"Thank you, Ed," said James with his voice dripping sarcasm. "This is very comforting, isn't it Sirius?"

"You're right, but we have to try. We did not make this treaty in vain!"

At this moment, they saw Lily and Marlene raising from their seats and leaving, probably to the Gryffindor Tower.

"Boys, I think we better go after them," said Emmeline. "And you two," she pointed to Sirius and James "better come up with excellent plans to make those two believe that you have changed."

After having said their 'good nights' and Dorcas and Remus having exchanged a sweet kiss, the two girls headed to the Gryffindor Tower.


	4. Chapter 4

After a marvellous dinner at the Great Hall, most students had decided to go to sleep in order to take some rest for the Hogsmead trip they were doing the next day. It had started to rain a bit during dinner, but a few hours later this bit of rain had turned into a really scary storm. Everything was quiet and calm in the girls' dormitory, except for one thing. Lily was moving restlessly in her bed, unable to sleep, memories of what she had seen that afternoon tormenting her...

_Flashback_

_She __had just eaten lunch and was heading to the library. Professor McGonagall had asked all her seventh year students to write an essay, which had to be at least one foot long, about _animagi_. Reaching her destination, Lily saw something that hurt her more than she thought possible. James Potter and Sarah Williams were kissing each other. The girl had her hands around his neck and he was holding a few books._

_It__ was too much for her to take. She had always had a crush on James but stayed away from him because he used to treat all girls like they were objects. But he seemed to have changed after the half of sixth year... He had stopped with his pranks, started doing his homework, was more responsible, more mature and stopped asking other girls out, saying it was to prove her she was the only girl he wanted. Lily was starting to trust him, seeing him as a friend and maybe as a future boyfriend._

_She ran as fast as she could to the Gryffindor Tower, hoping it was empty so that nobody would see her crying. __Lily hated it when people with the exception of her closest friends saw her in this situation. The entire school thought she was always strong and she wanted it to stay this way._

_After hearing__ the password, the Fat Lady let her in without questions about her red eyes and tears falling down her cheeks, which was a miracle since she was always so up for gossip. Lily ran up the stairs, opened the dormitory's door, jumped in her bed and hid her head in her pillow._

_End of Flashback_

Because of the memory, tears started falling down her face again and Lily decided to go down to the Common Room, where she would not wake her room mates, to watch the fire burning in the fireplace. This always seemed to make her feel better when she was sad.

* * *

What Lily didn't know was that she wasn't the only one in the Gryffindor Tower that was unable to sleep. A certain Marauder was having sleep problems and moving restlessly in his bed too.

This Marauder was no other than James Potter. James just couldn't believe his lack of luck... He had started asking Lily out when they were in fifth year and she had always answered 'no', never forgetting to add that she would never go out with an arrogant prat like him. He had tried everything to call her attention: pranks, hexing other students, always catching the snitch in Quidditch causing Gryffindor to win almost every single game... Nothing had worked until he decided that it was time to grow up. Since then he had made so much progress with Lily. She had stopped yelling at him for no reason and his presence didn't seem to bug her so much anymore... She was even gentle to him sometimes! But this was over now, the little trust he had obtained from her was now lost because of a stupid girl who was obsessed with him. Lily would never believe he was innocent.

Afraid of waking his friends with his restless turning in bed, James decided to spend some time downstairs at the Common Room to see if sleep would find him there.

* * *

Lily walked down the stairs and took a seat at her favourite couch in the Common Room, the one that was placed right in front of the fireplace. She embraced her legs, put her chin on her knees and still crying started singing a part of one of her favourite songs.

"_But it's a fantasy... Not a reality... And it's no good, no, no good for me... You have no idea..._"

* * *

James was slowly walking down the stairs when he heard something. A voice. And it was singing, singing a very sad love song. He reached the Common Room and saw someone sitting on the couch in front of the fireplace. It was a girl. He couldn't see her face, it was hidden by her legs, but he could see her hair, red hair. Lily. Lily was there, alone, singing a sad love song and crying. He didn't know what to do: go up the stairs again before she noticed he was there or talk to her. He took all the courage he had and decided to go for the second option. James walked until he reached the couch and positioned himself in front of it, facing Lily.

"Lily," he said and then they heard the loud noise of a thunder. She jumped out of her seat, embraced his waist and buried her face in his chest. He instinctively embraced her back. A few moments later another thunder could be heard and Lily tightened her hold around James' waist. "You are afraid of thunders," said James, noticing she was trembling.

Hearing this, Lily realized what she was doing and tried to push herself away from the boy, but he didn't let her go and pulled her even closer. "Why on earth do I still feel so safe in your arms after all you did?" Lily said in a whisper. She just wanted to feel safe and realizing she wouldn't feel this way in any other place than James' arms, she gave up and put her arms back around him.

"Lily, I need to talk to you about what you saw or what you think you saw this afternoon..." He was about to continue but looked up to him and placed a finger on his lips. "Please, don't say anything, just for now. I'm just not on the best condition right now..." She said and removed her finger from his lips, replacing her arm around him. "Ok, but you'll have to promise me that you'll give me the chance to talk to you tomorrow and explain everything." Lily just nodded in agreement.

He lifted her up bridal-style and sat on the couch with her on his lap. She just leaned her head against his shoulder and said "Good night, James. Thank you."

"Shh, I'll always be here for you. Good night, my Lily-flower." He kissed her forehead and instants later they both fell asleep.


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's Note: Hey guys! This is finally a brand new chapter to this story, which was btw called 'Do you really think I would leave you now?' before I decided to change it. I'll try not to take too long until I update again. Please review and tell me what you think of it. Thank you. Love, Caroline xx**

* * *

James woke up the next day and felt cold and empty somehow, as if something was missing. As he put his hands on his lap, he remembered what had happened the night before. Lily had left and he was alone in the Common Room.

He decided to go back to his dorm, take a shower and get ready for the Hogsmead trip that would happen a few hours later. He just hoped Lily would believe him. She just had to; he couldn't afford losing her again, especially after being so close...

* * *

Lily knew she shouldn't have promised to let James explain but somehow couldn't bring herself to regretting it. She wanted to hear what he had to say, she wanted him to be innocent, she wanted to be with him. Was it wrong to want to be happy with the person you love?

For some reason, leaving him there alone in the Common Room was one of the most difficult things she'd ever done. The felling of being in his arms, warm and protected... It was like she belonged there, it felt right.

She was now in the girls' dormitory, getting ready for the trip and about to wake up her three friends. She kneeled down the bed next to hers and whispered "Good morning, sunshine."

"Good morning, Lils. Are you feeling better today, sweetie?" asked a still sleepy Dorcas.

"I am, thank you," she answered, even smiling a bit. "I'd like to talk to you for a bit before we wake up the others. Is that okay with you?"

"Of course it is!" answered Dorcas. She was so happy to see that Lily wanted to open up a bit. It wasn't really healthy to keep it all within her. "Let's get into the bathroom so the others can sleep a bit more."

Both girls walked quietly into the bathroom and closed the door behind them. "So, what's the matter, honey?"

"Well, something happened last night after you all fell asleep. I just couldn't sleep because of what I saw and because of the _storm_..." She was even shaking a bit after saying it.

"Oh gosh, there was a storm last night? I didn't even notice it!" said Dorcas. "Well, I'm a heavy sleeper but you must've been terrified! One of the only things you're afraid of are storms."

"That'd be right. So, I went down to the Common Room in order not to wake you guys and guess who came down just a few minutes later!"

"Just the last person you wanted to see: James," Dorcas couldn't contain a bit of laughter after this. "Lily, I just can't believe your lack of luck, but tell me, what happened?"

"I acted like a little kid, I still can't believe it!" she stopped for a bit and continued "Just seconds after he said my name, announcing he was there, there was a _really_ loud thunder. Before I could think, my arms were wrapped around his waist and my face was hidden in his chest..." Dorcas could clearly see the frustration in her friend's voice and decided to interrupt for a bit.

"Oh twin, it's not your fault you're afraid of storms and I'm sure James didn't thinks it was pathe-" Lily interrupted before she could end the sentence.

"I don't know if he did. In any case, he didn't show it. He couldn't have been more gentle and understanding..." Lily let out a deep sigh and went on. "When I noticed what I was doing I tried to get away from him but he wouldn't let me, he just held me even tighter to his body."

"Lils, that's so sweet!" Dorcas was really happy she wasn't the only one in the group anymore to have some romance in her life. Everyone in the group had found her on Marauder and she hoped that they would all get together soon.

"Yeah, he really was," she agreed. "He tried to explain what I saw earlier in front of the library but I wasn't really in condition to hear it at the time. He respected it but made me promise I'd let him explain today."

"That's great, Lils!" Lily was surprised by how enthusiastic her friend seemed to be. "Please Lily, hear me out on this," Dorcas said while putting her hands on Lily's shoulders "I talked to James yesterday and I know what happened. Please, hear what he has to say and try not to be stubborn... He really likes you and has for a long time now. I think you should give him a chance."

"I promise I'll try, twin... But I'm really afraid of getting hurt, you know?" Lily was holding back tears now. "And the worst thing is that I don't even have the right to be mad at him! He's not my boyfriend or anything like that..." she said trailing of a bit.

"Stop with that right now!" Dorcas said, a bit louder than she intended to. "The guy says he loves you and is trying to make you trust him so it is obvious that you have the right to be angry at him if he's making out with another girl!"

"Okay, I don't really want to discuss this with you right now," she said. "I just want to take a nice warm shower and get ready for Hogsmead."

"Right, I got the hint," she winked at her friend and smiled. "I'll just go and wake up the others. Just relax and think about what I said, okay?"

"I promise," Lily said. "And D?"

"Yes Lily?" Dorcas asked.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome, sweety. Now go and get ready to meet James," she said in a sing-song voice. "Oh my God, I bet Marlene is going to have a fit when she finds out that she'll be alone with Sirius for the day!" was the last thing she said before she exited the bathroom and left Lily alone.

The red-head took in a deep breath before taking off her clothes and stepping into the shower. She really hoped her friend was right about James.


End file.
